Week 16

Hello all and Welcome to Post-Natal Week 16

Estella will be 4 months officially on Monday. I'm excited that she is growing up however 4 months sounds so much older to me then 3 months, and I just want her to stay a baby. Obviously she is still a baby at 4 months too, but she is so much bigger and smarter every day that sometimes it doesn't feel that way. Eric was saying to me that he likes to talk to her as if she has his intelligence level. I do the same thing. We are not parents that use baby talk to communicate. We don't shorten or make up words. Her pacifier is just that, it's not a binky. She does not get a baba, she gets a bottle, and so forth. But I suppose if we spoke to her in a shortened baby way maybe it wouldn't feel like she is growing up so fast. Who knows?

So I started back to work on March 2nd. March 1st I was a crying wreck. I thought that I was abandoning my baby and that she would somehow remember me leaving her and putting her in this strange place. I tried to work out in my head how we could afford to live in our house without 2 incomes. I thought that maybe we should move into a smaller house in the suburbs so that I could stay home and Eric would go to work. Sunday March 1st was not a good day for me. Fast forward to the next morning and it's a completely different story. I slept well. I woke up, got myself ready for work, fed the baby and left for work. Estella made it easier by falling back asleep before I left the house. And she was an angel with Eric the whole day. What more could I ask for?

As I made my way closer to the office I became more and more excited. I didn't realize how much I missed the daily conversations about everything and nothing. I felt as if I was getting back to my old life. Having Eric home with Estella the first day was key. It made me more comfortable knowing that she was with her daddy. And I have loved being back at work. 3 weeks now and it's going great. Estella is in a daycare that is 1 block away from my office, so I go in and feed her at lunchtime. It's so nice to get a little Estella fix. Eric still has her 2 days a week for the time being as well. Once he starts working on a wall she will be in daycare full time. The cost of daycare is shocking. It makes sense when you break it down per hour, but we have basically taken on a second mortgage for what it costs per month. It's scary. So the cost is also a major reason why Eric will watch her 2 days a week for as long as he can. (Besides that fact that he loves being home with her too) She seems to be thriving in the daycare as well. The facility is right in Center City and there are parents dropping in and out all day. Everyone is polite and they treat the children well. It's the best solution for a situation that is not ideal. She has a little cold that I know she caught from the other babies, but we were completely expecting that. She's fine just a little congested. I'm not scared of the germs, and I actually glad she's a little ill. Building up immunities is a messy process.

The next few weeks are going to be very full. It actually started this past Wednesday with my first trip to NYC to see a client since my return to work. I wasn't sure I wanted to go, but it all worked out fine. Eric had her for 15+ hours by himself. She was very fussy at the end of the day but everyone got through it in the end. Being a nursing mother it was very hard for me at the end of the day. I pumped for the last time at 3pm and didn't get home until 11:30pm. Needless to say I was looking forward to seeing my little girl that evening if nothing more than for relief. But the NYC trip is just the beginning. I have a shower, NYC again, birthdays (mine is on Tuesday! Yay 31!, Eric's is on Thursday! Yay 30!) taxes, Janice and Frank are coming home, hair appointments, dress appointments, bachelor/bachelorette party, shots for the little girl and the wedding of the year! It's going to be busy. Lots of fun, but busy.

I think that's about all this week. Everything is going very well. Estella is a blast and all I can so is smile when I think of her.

Love to you all!

Desiree